Michigan Potholes Aren’t Funny, but These Names for Them Are

Get ready for Spring and pothole season in Michigan. Since MDOT decided to begin naming snow plows, we think they should name potholes too.

Michigan always seems to rank very near the top of those "worst roads in the nation" lists every year. Potholes are our nemesis. They spring up as quick as new flowers at Easter and multiply faster than bunnies. They can be costly and, although you can file paperwork with the state, good luck actually getting reimbursed for damages to your car if you inadvertently find one of the big ones. The best thing we can do is have a sense of humor about it. In 2019, someone in Detroit planted tomatoes in a pothole and I'm waiting for someone to plant Christmas trees like the guy in Massachusetts did in 2020.

The Michigan comedy and wit was on full display when Michigan Department of Transportation announced they would be naming snow plows, with suggestions like Plow Bunyan, Gordie Plowe, Spready Mercury, Slick-fil-A and more. Soon, a commenter came up with the idea of naming potholes as well and the ideas were instant classics:

• Tire slayer
• Slasher
• Splasher
• The pit
• Crater face
• Moon walk
• Volcano
• Swimmin' hole

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Since something worse than potholes has taken over the focus of Governor Whitmer this past year, sadly, it might be a while before they fix the damn roads. Maybe the best we can do is chill out with some Lake Effect Pothole ice cream and watch this video that proves how bad Michigan's roads really are.